Ranger Jess

January 3, 2022

This is a flashback to April of 2018 after getting back from my epic spring break in Spain with Jo.

After spending my whole spring break naked with Joe in Fuerteventura, it was really hard to settle back into a regular clothed routine.  For the first week of being home, I would go right up upstairs after school and just stay naked in my room and sketch and do my homework.  My mom and dad began worrying that I was depressed or doing drugs.  

Eventually I settled back into wearing clothes and going about my normal life. 

I eagerly watched the weather forecast through a dreary winter and finally in the second week of April the temperature was set to pop up into the mid 60’s and that was good enough for me.  I slipped out of the house with my bike one clear Saturday morning and headed out to the nature preserve.  I biked past the gate onto the fire trail and stopped at my favorite oak tree.  I peeled off my clothes and started biking up the trails.  

It felt so great!  I wished Jo was with me.  I biked thru the dappled sunshine and trees remembering the roads that Jo and I had traveled, naked and free.  I was loving the feeling of the wind on my naked body, barreling down a gravel trail and as I turned a curve, I ran straight into a little park ranger ATV with the ranger standing right next to it.  I hit my breaks so hard that the bike pitched forward and I tumbled onto the gravel road, my bike crashing down next to me.  

“I’m ok!” I announced, holding my scraped elbow and embarrassed by my awkward spill onto the road.  

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.”  The ranger replied, moving to help me up.  “I'm surprised you’ve only got a scrape or two, that was a wicked spill you took.”

The ranger helped me up and introduced herself as Ranger Jess.  “If you’re not going to wear a helmet, you really should be more careful and watch your speed young miss.”  She cautioned me.  It struck me as funny that I was standing in front of this park ranger completely naked, and she was just taking to me about not wearing a helmet.

She made sure I was ok and inspected my bike to make sure it wasn’t too damaged.  For a moment we stood chatting, looking at each other and I finally had to ask her;

“Aren’t you going to arrest me, or give me some sort of ticket?”

“For what?”  Ranger Jess asked.

“Well, I don’t know… ” I said, extending my arms out and calling attention to my naked body.  “You've probably that noticed I am completely naked.”

“Well, this Mendocino County open space preserve.”  Ranger Jess began, “In Mendocino County, you can choose to recreate naked as long as you are more than 300 feet from a public right of way, road or camping area.”

“You mean”, I stammered, “I’m not actually breaking the law by riding around naked here?”

“No.  If you were breaking the law, I would have given you a citation last year when I first saw you running around my woods naked.”  She said with a smile.

I was completely speechless.  This ranger has been watching me ride around the preserve naked for a year.

I biked home feeling a mixture of gratitude and disappointment.  All this time I thought I was taking some huge risk by being naked here in the open space preserve, I was actually free to be naked.  It made me wonder, how many of us have permission, have the right to be naked and we never know it.  How many of us just assume we don’t have the freedom to be naked, but we actually do.